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Pre-Trump's Dumbass Tariffs Price: 20% Cheaper
"I’ve been a customer for years and the shipping has always been so fast that it genuinely surprises me. All of her products are top notch and the quality has remained the same over the years. I’d buy anything new from this shop and not be remotely concerned that I may dislike it." ~ Brittney, New Castle, OH
We could tell you this shit is like soaking in a giant tub of tequila, but hey, we won't bullshit you. Nothing is that fucking good. However, our bath salts come pretty close. These salts are the real deal, no-fucking-around, seriously cleansing shit. Packed with sodium, magnesium, and potassium, they balance out your wacky shit, firm your skin, cleanse your pores, and hell, they might even balance your fucking checkbook. And you know what? They'll even help you break it off with that psycho who's been begging you to join her barre class. Bitch, please.
This shit is infused with real fucking amazing essential oils. We're talking lavender, sage, and lemon verbena here, and it's a match made in heaven. These oils will soothe your tired ass, leaving you feeling like a goddamn champion. It'll unschnoz your schnoz, if your schnoz is schnozzy. European sea salt will put the kibosh on any and all ass-aches and sore muscles, so if you're butthurt you'll soon be feeling fucking fantastic.
This is some seriously soothing shit. We ain't fucking around.
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You don't need fixing.
Packaging you can feel good about.
Join the self-care cult. (The good kind.)
Treat your self AND your wallet.
All natural. No fake shit.
Because fresh bitches deserve fresh skincare.
Made with rage and love.
SELF CARE TO FUEL YOUR FIRE.
We’re into you. Your style, your anti-style. Your un-fucked-with hair, your pink bouffant. Whatever you’re rocking, we like it. Lots of beauty companies are in the insecurities-mining business, but we’re SO not about all that. You do you. It’s working.
Listen, skin care doesn’t need to cost a car payment, ok? It just doesn’t. There are no ingredients so magical and precious that they warrant two zeroes. Self care isn’t a privilege. It’s meant to be shared with your bestie, spontaneous-like, just because you thought of her. We help make that happen.
None of that bad fake shit. Who needs it? Preservatives, fake colors, stabilizers, artificial fragrances. Everything we use is a raw material: coconut oil, beeswax, milk powder, citric acid, argan oil. The fucking building blocks of healthy skin. Why would anyone want anything other?
