









100% Secure Payments: Your details are protected and safe with us.
Kinky as Fuck Massage Bar.
- Unit price
- / per
Soft skin meets filthy minds. This sultry AF bar melts on contact and smells like a midnight rendezvousādark, musky, and ready for trouble. Perfect for turning up the heat and getting hands-on. Safe word optional.
Texture: Firm, non-greasy solid
Size: 1.5 ounces / 42.5 grams by weight
Packaging: Choose a sturdy aluminum travel tin or an eco friendly vellum wrapper for your lotion bar.



Melt Into Bliss with this Sensual Massage Oil Bar.
Imagine the seductive scene: our sexy massage bar slowly melting on your partner's skin, igniting the flames of a face-melting fuckfest. We're not here to play gamesāwhen it comes to setting the mood, nothing screams "face-melting fucking" quite like a sensual massage.
⢠Pure-Ass Natural Pleasure: Badgers like us know how to do massages right, and that's why we've crafted this massage bar with 100% pure-ass natural skincare goodness. We take your pleasure seriously, so get ready to indulge in a sensory journey like no other.
⢠Smells like a Tropical Freaking Paradise: This massage bar boasts a delightful blend of vanilla, rose, and ginger extracts, leaving you smelling like Tahitian hotel bubble bath. Trust us, there's nothing better than smelling irresistibly enticing.
⢠Portable Luxury: With its compact size, our massage bar is your travel-friendly companion. Slip it into your bag and enjoy nourished skin on the go, without the hassle of leaky bottles or airport security drama.
So unwrap this shit and slather yourself the fuck up. You're welcome.
Coconut oil, shea butter, beeswax, dried black beans, mica, vanilla extract, rose absolute, ginger essential oil.
Unwrap and rub gently on dry skin, focusing on problem areas like elbows, knees, and heels. Pro tip: for peak absorption, use fresh-from-the-shower after you've toweled off.
How fast do you ship?
Orders ship within 1-2 business days.
How much does shipping cost?
Gift sets always ship for free, so there's that.
For all other items, we use calculated shipping. Domestic orders generally cost between $3- $7 to ship, depending on zip code and what you order.
If you're in a hurry, we offer expedited shipping as well. šØ
Do you offer returns?
Yup! The only caveats are, the item has to be unused, and it's gotta make it back to us in good shape. Please get in touch within seven days of receiving your order if you'd like to return an item.
Because the cost of our glass jars shot up 20%āthanks to some genius-level trade policy moves. We're not into secrets, just self-care. So we adjusted prices to stay afloat and told you the damn truth.
Adding product to your cart
100% Secure Payments: Your details are protected and safe with us.

Orders ship within 2 business days.

You don't need fixing.

Packaging you can feel good about.

Join the self-care cult. (The good kind.)

Treat your self AND your wallet.

All natural. No fake shit.

Because fresh bitches deserve fresh skincare.

Made with rage and love.

What our customers say
First time ordering and I absolutely love this scrub! I used it and my face was brighter and felt so soft after! I will be ordering this product again as well as many of the others!
The Magnesium Deodorant is a must-have for anyone with sensitive skin! Itās completely baking soda-free, yet still keeps me fresh all day without irritation. The natural formula is gentle but effective, and I love that itās eco-friendly with zero waste packaging. It glides on smoothly, absorbs well, and has a clean, refreshing feel. If youāre looking for a natural deodorant that actually works without compromising on sustainability, this is the ONE!
Last minute buy that shipped extremely fast a week before Christmas. Iāve been a customer of this seller for several years and the shipping has always been so fast that it genuinely surprises me. All of her products are top notch and the quality has remained the same over the years. Iād buy anything new from this shop and not be remotely concerned that I may dislike it.
I got this on a whim but I'm so glad I did. I love the spiked apple cider, it's so good, and it's honestly probably one of the best lip balms I've used in a long time, my lips don't dry out nearly as fast after using this one in comparison to others I've used in the past. Absolutely love it, highly recommend.
Fuck Off Bugs is a great product. I am very prone to mosquito bites, but since using this I've only had 2. The smell is strong like all bug repellents, but not unpleasant. It's not heavy on the skin. It doesn't upset my sensitive skin. Overall it's A+

Self Care to Fuel Your Fire.
š„ Body positive š„
Weāre intoĀ you.Ā Your style, your anti-style. Your un-fucked-with hair, your pink bouffant. Whatever youāre rocking, we like it. Lots of beauty companies are in the insecurities-mining business, but weāre SO not about all that. You do you. Itās working.
š„ Accessible š„
Listen, skin care doesnāt need to cost a car payment, ok? It just doesnāt. There are no ingredients so magical and precious that they warrant two zeroes. Self care isnāt a privilege. Itās meant to be shared with your bestie, spontaneous-like, just because you thought of her. We help make that happen.
š„ All good shit š„
None of that bad fake shit. Who needs it? Preservatives, fake colors, stabilizers, artificial fragrances. Everything we use is a raw material: coconut oil, beeswax, milk powder, citric acid, argan oil. The fucking building blocks of healthy skin. Why would anyone want anything other?
As seen in...





App section
Smells great, we love these massage bars!
Great quality product with absolutely hilarious product copy. The scent and texture of the lotion are both lovely, and the added coffee beans for texture are a delightful surprise touch.
Got it as a birthday gift for my friend! She loves how it smells!
Perfect! My girlfriend and I love it!
These were a hit at the bachelorette! Great attention to detail.
Our Bestsellers:
Boss Bitch Bath Bomb.
$15.99
- Unit price
- / per
$15.99
- Unit price
- / per
Pamper Your Ass Gift Set.
from $43.99
- Unit price
- / per
from $43.99
- Unit price
- / per
Kinky as Fuck Massage Bar.
from $10.99
- Unit price
- / per
from $10.99
- Unit price
- / per
Fuck Off, Bugs Natural Bug Repellent Stick.
$15.99
- Unit price
- / per
$15.99
- Unit price
- / per
Simmah Down Bitch Bath Salts.
$11.99
- Unit price
- / per
$11.99
- Unit price
- / per
Man Hands Hand Scrub for Men.
$16.99
- Unit price
- / per
$16.99
- Unit price
- / per
Coco Loco Whipped Body Butter.
$18.99
- Unit price
- / per
$18.99
- Unit price
- / per
Berry Fucking Pink Lip Balm.
$7.99
- Unit price
- / per
$7.99
- Unit price
- / per
MILF Gift Set.
from $43.99
- Unit price
- / per
from $43.99
- Unit price
- / per
Wine Lips Sugar Lip Scrub.
$8.49
- Unit price
- / per
$8.49
- Unit price
- / per