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Massage Gift Set for Him.

Massage Gift Set for Him.

Regular price $54.99 USD
Regular price Sale price $54.99 USD
Sale Sold out
Shipping calculated at checkout.

999 in stock

A funny Valentine's day gift that's all natural and handmade: Ever notice how "funny gift" and "quality gift" rarely overlap? Yeah. We believe you deserve premium bath products and a chuckle. 

Great presentation, secure shipping: The hot pink gable box with ribbon and loofah pad, plus free shipping, are always part of the Badgerface gift set experience.

Don't Mince Words with this Massage Gift Set for Him.

Let's be real. Sometimes you just need your joint worked on. And sometimes, he's slow on the uptake. Am I right? Sometimes he's so fucking engrossed in gaming that he forget you (and your clitoris) exist.

Interrupt his Twitch-streaming suckfest with something sure to get his ass off the couch. If there's one thing we know, it's that men almost always want to fuck. All they need is to be told in the most direct of ways.

A Funny Valentine's Day Gift That's Actually Quality.

What is it about special occasions that screams give me a bunch of cheesy crap!? Seriously. This Valentine's Day, dispense with the cliché crap and give something hilarious, unique - and actually quality.

Handcrafted from premium ingredients, our massage gift set contains a romantic pillow mist, a massage oil, and a massage bar that are all natural, cruelty-free, and made by our badass woman-owned small business.

Our Massage Gift Set for Him Contains:

  • Romantic Body Mist, to help set the mood. It's scented with rose, vanilla, and cardamom.
  • Natural Argan Massage Oil, scented with natural geranium, bergamot, and lime essential oils.
  • Massage Bar of your choice. There's a guide to scents below 👇.)

By now you probably don't need anymore convincing that this massage gift set is just what you need to facilitate a little more mattress mambo. So what's stopping you? Grab one today - it'll arrive within a week - and you can start blocking time in your busy schedule.

Time for fucking, in case I need to be more clear. (You can thank us later.)

Massage Bar Scent Options:

Kinky as Fuck - Vanilla, rose, and ginger
Tingly as Fuck - peppermint, eucalyptus, and a touch of vanilla
Spicy Fucking - cinnamon, ginger, anise, and black pepper

 

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  • All orders ship within two business days.
  • Pastel pink Etsy logo with Editor's pick insignia underneath.
  • Smartass and Sass subscription box company logo in pink.
  • Pink Buzzfeed logo.
  • Pink logo for Good Housekeeping magazine.
  • Pink Popsugar logo.
  • Offbeat wed logo in pink.

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How fast do you ship?

Orders ship within two business days.

How much does shipping cost?

Gift sets always ship for free, so there's that.

For all other items, we use calculated shipping. Domestic orders generally cost between $3- $7 to ship, depending on zip code and what you order.

If you're in a hurry, we offer expedited shipping as well. đź’¨

Do you offer returns?

Yup! The only caveats are, the item has to be unused, and it's gotta make it back to us in good shape. Please get in touch within seven days of receiving your order if you'd like to return an item.